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I guess it’s “really, really, good” isn’t much of a spoiler. But it’s accurate. The May 17 Gossip Girl sendoff features big payoffs, several OMG! twists, and a Georgina comeback. Enough, if you ask me, to more than make up for an uneven (but not nearly as bad as some people have said!) season. Most importantly, Chuck/Blair fans freaking out over a certain spoiler-laced European trailer that shows the couple nearing third base should simmer down and judge things after watching the entire hour — a sentiment echoed by exec producer Stephanie Savage.
“I really encourage people who have seen that promo to tune in and watch the whole episode in context,” she pleads. “Those were a few moments that were taken out of context to create the most salacious experience possible. And some people who are having a negative reaction to what they’re seeing I think will have a different reaction when they see it in context. Everyone’s making decisions that are reasonable based on the information that they have.”
In other words, Savage and Co. wouldn’t do you, or your faves, wrong. “This is a story that has been three years in the telling — going back to the pilot,” she reminds us. “And that’s a story that we’ll keep telling in season 4. So I don’t think it’s coming out of nowhere. And it lands on everybody. It lands on Dan, Blair, Serena, Rufus, Lily, Nate — every single person has a POV about this, and we’re going to see these ripple effects over time. “
For now, though, here are eight tantalizing teases to calm you down, wind you up or, most likely, both. Next Monday’s capper will include a:
· Threesome
· Departure
· Mini time-jump
· Engagement ring!
· Shooting
· Birth
· Shocking OMG! twist
· A pair of spectacular Jenny smackdowns at the hands of Blair (Leighton Meester never better!)
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Dan, Olivia, Vanessa and Blair
The threesome has blown it for Dan.
He had both a girlfriend and a best friend. Now he’s got … well, he doesn’t have a girlfriend. Or the best friend he yearns for.
Dan is thinking he’s all that and even plans with Vanessa to see Morrissey live like they always do.
This irks Olivia, who offered to help Dan with his application to the playwriting program at Tisch, but is thwarted by Dan’s plans with V.
She ends up growing claws a little bit later, possibly due to exposure to Blair, and ruins the plans by volunteering herself and Dan for the fairy tale-themed cabaret night that Blair’s desperate to be involved in.


She lies and says she signed them up for it a month ago.
Dan goes to Vanessa with his idea about a “Snow White” musical featuring the songs of Tisch alumna Lady Gaga, blowing Olivia’s story.
He gets Vanessa to direct, managing to enrage both Blair and Olivia in one shot. Rehearsal’s awful, the ladies are tense, and Olivia storms off.
Olivia figures out that the real problem with the three of them is Dan, who hasn’t been able to face the fact that he has feelings for Vanessa.
She leaves the show halfway through, forcing Vanessa to take over her role and kiss Dan, according to the script.
Stop kidding yourself, she tells him, and later decides to take the movie.
Vanessa, meanwhile, approaches the two of them wanting to talk, and assures Olivia she has no feelings for Dan. Which leaves him in a rough spot.
Blair, meanwhile, tries to get Lady Gaga to perform to win over the NYU crowd, and in the end, she comes through, with Gaga singing her hit “Bad Romance.” Appropriate.
Serena and Nate
Serena shows up at work and is trying to do the right thing and stay away from Tripp until he moves to Washington, even though circumstance seems to keep throwing them together.
She turns to Nate for help, and like a trooper he keeps her company and keeps her busy to keep her away from Tripp until he leaves.
They go for a walk in the park. They get gelato. They get drunk.
Nate, who earlier lamented his lack of a girlfriend or a girl friend, confesses that he’s loved Serena. He moves in to kiss her.
But wouldn’t you know it, in walks Tripp, upset because he found out Maureen was responsible for the Hudson River hoax. He doesn’t want to be alone.
Nate tries to warn Serena off, stating the obvious, which is that Tripp is married. If you go with him now you’re going to cross the line, he tells her.
But the line just got a little blurry, says Serena. She leaves with Tripp and we see them kiss.
Jenny
Jenny’s bored, and Lily’s trying to set her up with a date with an eligible young man for the horticultural society ball.
She ends up spending the day with Damien, the son of a high-rolling diplomat hotel guest that Chuck’s trying to get in good with.
He’s cute, he’s originally from Brussels, and in the park the girls from another snooty prep school are watching jealously.
Then he starts playing with the sailboats in the pond, which Jenny finds nerdy until she learns it’s a means for him to deal drugs.
Jenny is enamored and goes with Damien to a club where he is about to make a drug deal, and even taking part as the one to actually hand over the money and the Ecstasy.
Then Chuck busts up the party, getting J out of there and throwing Damien and his diplomat father out of the hotel. Being with Damien may have been exciting, he warns her, but you don’t want to go there.
After he deposits her safely at home, Jenny texts Damien, saying she had fun and they should do it again. Scandalous!
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